Sunday, July 22, 2007

An Improbable Escenary: CSO Hinky

A couple of weeks ago I was called to Mahogany Row to interview for the Chief Security Officer position.

It was all I could do to keep a straight face. In the end, I told them flat out I wasn't their boy, but I wished them good luck and total support for the CSO when they finally got one.

After all, the position's been open for over three years now. The last CSO went mad. Totally fucking mad. Both he and the CIO were tossed out on their asses. The CIO wasn't crazy. His problem stemmed from not being able to keep it in his pants.

Ah, those were the days.

I value what little sanity I have left. This organization is rough on lowly managers, let alone CxO types. Management seems to have greater longevity, at least in my experience. And they are only slightly less mad.

The less said about it, the better, but the new CSO is scheduled to show up before September. It should be fun and I'll tell you all about it, since we don't have a Blog Policy... yet.

It seems I picked a bad time to try to generate "Free iPhone" Google News Alert hits. Stephen Colbert picked the same time to whine about not getting a free iPhone, so he took all the hits. Then he actually got one and got more hits. Maybe if I mention them both in the same sentence I can get a hit.


In the meantime, Ive got another Google News Alert on the word "escenary". I keep getting the same hit over and over every week. Don't bother looking it up. It's not a real word. It appears to be a word used only by people for whom English is a second language. Check it out. In context it means either "scenery" or "scenario". Here's a useage example for the Google bots...

"In a humorous escenary witnessed by millions of TV viewers, Stephen Colbert conned Apple out of a free iPhone."

Two birds, one stone.

Saturday, July 07, 2007


The media is making a big deal about today's date, due to all the lovebirds who've scheduled their weddings today.

I say, "Big effing deal."

Dates like 0x/0x/0x (where x > 0 and x < 13)are cheap the first 12 years of any century. It happens once a freakin' year for 12 years. Ho. Hum. The last three are more interesting than the first 9, but after 12/12/12 you'll be waiting ten years for another string of repeating digits.

Now... feast your eyes on this date:


It's much more attractive typographically. All those straight, parallel lines. Thirty years ago, that was one helluva date. And you won't see it again for 70 years.

Last year on 06/06/06, people, Xians in particular, were flipping out. Not many folks scheduled their weddings on that day (although I'm sure it happened somewhere). We all know the issue with that one.

In fact I first became aware of interesting dates on 6/6/66. Before that, I was oblivious. 6/6/66 was the last day of the 6th grade. On that day, our school had a bomb scare and they sent us outside to play for the whole day while the Fire Department checked out the school.

These days CNN would show up with a few helicopters and some satellite uplinks, but those were simpler times.

That day, while I was having a good time running around on the playground, a classmate told me it was the End of the World, due to the fact it was 6/6/66, and that the bomb scare was part of God's plan to wipe us all out.

Serious buzzkill for a 6th grader.

Of course, Nothing Happened. But I went through the rest of the day expecting nuclear war, and the rest of my life watching the date.

The only memorable one since then was 7/7/77. 8/8/88 and 9/9/99 were uneventful. Same with the 0x series. Take away the dates I have to remember (birthdays, anniversaries, etc.) and 7/7/77 is the only date I want to remember. It's definitely a date I can't forget.

YIM me if you want to know why.

You could win a FREE iPhone!

But not by playing UT on BOT House! Or anywhere else for that matter.

Sorry to get your hopes up.

The only reason I'm telling you this is because I have a Google news alert for "FREE iPhone" and I'm testing to see if I can get a hit from here on BlogSpot.

I think the chances are good, since Google owns BlogSpot, but it didn't work with "Security 3.0". That was another experiment that didn't work.