Friday, July 25, 2008

Customer Satisfaction Surveys

I hate filling out customer satisfaction surveys. I have one from GoDaddy in my mailbox right now.

Yes, it's concerning the infamous "426 Connection closed. Transfer aborted" issue. If you're not familiar with this issue, Google "426 connection closed godaddy".

Without the quotes.

The first two hits should be me.

They think they have a handle on it now. They think "somebody" is filling up the disk drive on the server, crowding my crappy little Web pages out.

I missed most of the action. The Proxy List was all screwed up. Most of the seven pages in the 8PM run were truncated, but I didn't notice it until around 9:30.

After I noticed that I started watching the log monitor up for The Map. At about 10:30 it started to choke, so I called GoDaddy with my special incident number. It "fixed itself" during the call, so now I have this Customer Satisfaction Survey to fill out.

How do I know if I'm satisfied? I don't think it's over, and if past performance is any indication of future results it probably won't be. But now I have this Customer Satisfaction Survey to deal with.

I usually piss people off when I fill these things out. I haven't seen stellar Technical Support in a long time. I used deal with one nameless vendor whose support was horrible. After every ticket they would send me a Custom Satisfaction Survey that rated their service on a 1 to 5 scale: Very Low (1), Low (2), Average(3), High (4), and Very High (5).

Even though their Tech Support was horrid, I know from my dealings with other vendors that all Tech Support is horrid, so I rated them "Average" on every survey they sent me.

Inevitably, their Customer Satisfaction Representative (CSR) would call me and ask me why I rated them low. Every single time I had to point out to this person that I rated them Average and not Low. Smack dab in the middle of their scale. Not High, not Low. AVERAGE. Par for the course. Nothing special. Just like everyone else. But not "Low".

They hated this. And I hated arguing about it. I begged them to stop sending me the surveys, but they wouldn't.

In the end I just stopped calling them for Technical Support. That was about a year ago. Very few of the tickets were ever resolved and we still have the same problems, but they don't care about that, all they care about is Customer Satisfaction. They just don't get the part about the problems not being solved.

Seriously, if they wanted to be rated Low they could have just made it a one to four scale and left out "Average" completely. Then, when the CSR called to ask me why I rated them Low I could just say...

"Because you didn't have Average."

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